In this moment, how does your body feel? Can you identify what feelings you are experiencing? Do you find yourself focusing on more negative than positive ones?
One of the top struggles I’ve seen my clients face is their relationship with perfectionism. While striving for achievements and goals can be a healthy mindset, it’s often riddled with thoughts of over-performing or perfectionism. The “thing under the thing” I often refer to.
The thing about the “thing under the thing” is there’s often negative undercurrents of thought processes which present in different ways. This can often look like anxiety, depression, addictions, the list goes on.
As women, we tend to think emotionally. We are just wired that way. Where this becomes a problem is when we over-identify with those negative thoughts and feelings. What this means is when we begin to believe the little lies we tell ourselves.
Those negative self-destructive thoughts we have conscious or unconsciously.
The reason they’re so problematic is that they’re not anchored in the truth of our soul purpose and they permeate to all parts of our lives. It becomes so ingrained in our thought process that we often don’t see it for what it is: a lie.
The cure for this problematic thought course? Mindfulness.
Brene Brown says: Mindfulness requires that we not “over-identify” with thoughts and feelings, so that we are not caught up and swept away by negativity.
According to Google, the definition for mindfulness is:
1. the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.
2. a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.
Now, knowing and practicing are two vastly different things. Where we often fall short is when we rely on our own thinking. We can justify and rationalize any mode of thought processes to align with what “feels” right and without the help or guidance from an outside source, we’re caught in this self-perpetuating cycle.
Perhaps you feel stuck in your mindfulness routine or you aren’t as regular as you’d like to be. Or maybe you don’t know where to start.
I’ve been there too.
It can be an overwhelming and exhausting experience. Sometimes we just don’t feel comfortable with those in our inner circle to open up to in this way or don’t know how to bring the topic up.
Know that you are not alone.
It would be an honor and privilege to hold sacred space for you.
Grace and Peace,